j'en ai marre.

tired of being bossed around, of being told what to do, of crossing all my Ts and dotting all my Is, of doing everything by the book, of being so conscious of what the rules are, of trying to please everyone, of trying to live up to everyone's expectations, of having to fight in a war that I see little purpose in.

I'm just really tired.

"Sooner or later, we will have to recognise that the Earth has rights, too, to live without pollution. What mankind must know is that human beings cannot live without Mother Earth, but the planet can live without humans." - Evo Morales

"If people destroy something replaceable made by mankind, they are called vandals; if they destroy something irreplaceable made by God, they are called developers." - Joseph Wood Krutch

"Black and white are the colours of photography. To me they symbolise the alternatives of hope and despair to which mankind is forever subjected." - Robert Frank

"If all mankind were to disappear, the world would regenerate back to the rich state of equilibrium that existed ten thousand years ago. If insects were to vanish, the environment would collapse into chaos." - E.O. Wilson

"The world is indeed comic, but the joke is on mankind." - H.P. Lovecraft

"I believe in aliens. I think it would be way too selfish of us as mankind to believe we are the only lifeforms in the universe." - Demi Lovato

"Of mankind we may say in general, they are fickle, hypocritical, and greedy of gain." - Niccolo Machiavelli

"Mankind's true moral test, its fundamental test (which lies deeply buried from view), consists of its attitude towards those who are at its mercy: animals. And in this respect mankind has suffered a fundamental debacle, a debacle so fundamental that all others stem from it." - Milan Kundera

"With the introduction of agriculture mankind entered upon a long period of meanness, misery, and madness, from which they are only now being freed by the beneficent operation of the machine." - Bertrand Russell

"Is it right to probe so deeply into Nature's secrets? The question must here be raised whether it will benefit mankind, or whether the knowledge will be harmful." - Pierre Curie

"Brutality to an animal is cruelty to mankind - it is only the difference in the victim." - Alphonse de Lamartine

"God is silent. Now if only man would shut up." - Woody Allen

"People speak sometimes about the 'bestial' cruelty of man, but that is terribly unjust and offensive to beasts; no animal could ever be so cruel as a man, so artfully, so artistically cruel." - Fyodor Dostoyevsky

"What is Man? Man is a noisome bacillus whom Our Heavenly Father created because he was disappointed in the monkey." - Mark Twain

"I am constantly amazed by man's inhumanity to man." - Primo Levi

"I don't hate people. I just feel better when they aren't around." - Charles Bukowski

"I'm tired of this back-slappin' 'isn't humanity neat' bullshit. We're a virus with shoes." - Bill Hicks

"I believe that there is an equality to all humanity. We all suck." - Bill Hicks

"What is Man? A miserable little pile of secrets." - André Malraux

"Everything else just kept picking and picking, hacking away. And nothing was interesting, nothing. The people were restrictive and careful, all alike. And I've got to live with these fuckers for the rest of my life, I thought." - Charles Bukowski

"The leech's kiss, the squid's embrace // The prurient ape's defiling touch: // And do you like the human race? // No, not much." - Aldous Huxley

"I expected nothing of man, and disown the race. The only folly is expecting what is never atatined; man is most contemptible when compared with his own pretensions. It is better to laugh at man from outside the universe, than to weep for him within." - H.P. Lovecraft

Everyone's competent at something. Everyone is good at one thing or another. Everyone has that one - or if they are exceptionally lucky two or even three - wow factor that will shape their experiences and lives.

I still can't find my place and it sucks.

The singer sounds 28. She's 38. The dancer looks 21. She's 11.

Reevaluating my life and my future.

I freaking suck

when filing/ packing/ clearing is the only thing that gives you an iota of control over your increasingly spiralling life

I should just go and live on an island somewhere, all by myself, since I lack the capabilities of interacting with any living organism whatsoever.

One piece of evidence from a very long list.

guilt trip day


I find it interesting how this year, I was the subject of 2 attempts at a birthday surprise (of which I figured out both were going to happen before they actually happened), had 2 cakes (and ate 1 and a half slices of each), and got utterly mortified twice. But I still feel really guilty/ bad.

And I don't feel 18. I still feel 15. I've felt 15 ever since I turned 15. And I'm pretty sure I still look 15.

As quickly as this is going, I still want this year to end asap.

Maybe I'll just indulge for the night.

10:22 PM toosoontoosoontoosoontoosoon

My sense of urgency is in a perpetual cycle of rising and falling, of ebbing and flowing, as if it were being controlled by the pull of the moon.

It's about time, don't you think?

Why 17 May, why?

Can things please just work out for once?

Have you ever asked yourself, do monsters make war, or does war make monsters?

- Laini Taylor, Daughter of Smoke and Bone

Please call again later. Too busy walking on clouds.

I should have gone into the arts stream. To think that I actually used to love science.

Screw expectations. Screw this society and its unhealthy obsession for pragmatism.

They're lying when they say hard work pays off.

But I haven't even gotten used to it yet.

I guess, when the short 5h flight you're on can just disappear into thin air, when the ferry journey to a school trip you've been looking forward to for ages can just sink, only then will you realise the true meaning of living life in the moment, of going for and doing the things you really want, of living the way you want to.

#yolo has never been more inspirational.

Is there anything wrong with wanting to live forever?

"Your position may not be one held by many others who attempted the same question but you managed to argue your case quite convincingly."

Because I spent hours on the plan.

Because I can't accept that the three beauties on my desk will die in a few days' time.

Because I've been asking myself this same question for as long as I can remember.

Because I've always needed more time.

Because I have and always will say no.

I can't do chemistry at all today period and my jaw really bloody hurts

Can't wait to get out of this fucking hell hole

I really like plan b.