#117

Recently, the tears have become my best friends.

Charles Darwin once said, “Survival of the strongest”. And I would love to add to his point, that, “Life is the survival of the strongest. Only the weakest die in the process.”

And cut all that shit about failure being the mother of success, because failure is really the mother of Hell. And success? I don’t want to even mention that word.

I don’t even know how I got into this super smart class (with the glorious exception of yours truly), or even how I got into this super stressful school. There must have been some kind of a twist of fate during DSA and PSLE. I was supposed to get 150, but the teacher marked wrongly and I got a shit 277 instead. I should have gone to some neighbourhood school, but I went to a neighbourhood school in Bukit Timah. If you even consider my school a neighbourhood school.

I don’t know why I cry. I just do. So much, they’ve become my best friends.

I cry when I’m upset.

I cry when I’m hurt.

I cry when I hate myself.

I cry when I have mood swings.

I cry when I think about EOYs.

I cry when I think about how early other schools finish.

I cry when I think about how lucky my brother is.

I cry when I think about my Chinese homework.

I cry when I think about my Math homework.

I cry when I think about History.

I cry when I think about Geography.

I cry when I think about Math.

I cry when I think about French.

I cry when I think about all the uncompleted papers chunked on the floor.

I cry when I think about life in the future.

I cry when I think about how everyone has moved on, and left me behind.

I cry when I think about how I'm actually hurting all the people around me.

I cry when I think about how painful the days are.

I cry when I think about my sucky life.

I cry when I think about death.

I cry for nothing.

“Life is the survival of the strongest. Only the weakest die in the process.”

Oh I love that phrase.

Labels: best friends, charles darwin, die, strongest, survival, tears, weakest